The Worst Thing You Can Do When Overcoming a Bad Break-Up

Whether your break-up is one that you’ve chosen, is amicable or had forced upon you it’s always going to be emotionally charged.

The last thing that you need is even more emotion in your life.

I’ve become more aware recently of people starting to create insulting nicknames for their ex-partners for a laugh.

Whilst it can seem like completely harmless fun it will actually be doing more damage to you than you realise.

Allow me to explain…

You’re only harming yourself

It can feel pretty fun if you’ve been wronged in a relationship to start calling your ex “shithead” or whatever behind their back.

It’s like a secret naughty schoolboy thing where you know you shouldn’t but you can so you do.

I’m not talking about saying “oh yeah, my ex is a shithead”, I’m talking about replacing their name with whatever hilarious moniker you’ve created.

But that nickname has been created out of hurt.

You’re calling them it because they’ve hurt you/cheated on you/disrespected you or whatever.

Your ex doesn’t know anything about this so it’s not bothering them, they’re off in their new relationship with their ski-instructor or whatever.

But to you, every time that nickname is used it is tied to the negative reasons that you created it in the first place.

The same is true if you’ve “hilariously” changed your ex’s contact name on your phone to this name – every time you get a message or call from them you’re just bringing it back.

You’re literally bringing that emotional pain back into your life on some level just for the sake of a quick laugh.

The much better alternative

Be a grown-up.

Lets say your ex is called John Smith and when you were together you called him Johnny.

Although it is clearly the same person your relationship with them has changed. You want there to be as little emotional connection to them as possible.

It’ll help you if you start referring to him as John/Jonathan both to his face and to friends and family.

If they’re saved on your contacts as Johnny then change that as well to “John Smith” – you don’t want getting a message from “Johnny” to pull at your heart strings and send you off down memory lane.

I know all of this sounds small but it all will help.

What next?

I will be writing a new blog on break-ups which will include a whole host of tips and advice that is aimed at guiding you through the emotional minefield of a relationship ending.

If you’d like to be among the first to find out when that is released please join my mailing list below.

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