How to stop worrying about the future and catastrophising

Worrying about the future is incredibly common in anxiety sufferers and people report that it is one of the hardest things to stop doing.

People ask why you wouldn’t worry when you don’t know what is going to happen, literally anything could happen, right? 

Depression is thought of as a past based illness because you dwell on so much that has already happened. Anxiety on the other hand is often future based as you tend to worry about what is yet to come.

In this blog I’m going to be sharing with you the very best techniques that I’ve ever learnt to help you to stop worrying about the future.

1. Remind yourself that you do not know what the future holds

If anyone really knew the future for certain they would be absolutely all powerful. It would be such an incredible power that they could become supreme ruler of the earth pretty much.

 If you think you know the future you’re wrong.

Sorry. 

How to stop worrying about the future:

Tell yourself firmly in words of your choosing that you do not know what the future holds because no-one does.

2. Don’t join any dots without concrete proof

Our thoughts about the future tend to be bad ones if we’re anxious and they come from a chain reaction of thoughts.

Something triggers a thought and our brain starts creating new thoughts based upon what has been said or done, from that another thought will start and another and so on.

Often these things happen very quickly. 

What to do to stop yourself catastrophising:

If you notice you’ve jumped to a new thought stop and ask yourself 
“Do I have any proof that A will definitely lead to B?”
Where A is what you were thinking and B is what you’re thinking now.
Do not join the dots unless you have undeniable proof.
Then tell yourself “I have no proof that this will definitely happen”

3. What if it DIDN’T happen?

When we worry about the future and catastrophize we tend to ask “what if [blank] happens” – it’s fine to ask that but every time you ask that also ask “What if it didn’t happen”

How to stop catastrophising:

Ask what if it didn’t for every what if it did

4. Stop assuming everything

We think we know how people will respond to things. We think we know what they’ll do but we actually don’t know anything.

People can be way more compassionate than you realise. They can surprise you with their responses to situations. They can be way kinder and understanding than you give them credit for.

How to stop worrying about what people are going to do:

Break your chain of thoughts by asking “Do I know for certain that this is how someone will respond to what’s happened”

5. Work in probabilities

Example – Omg, this happened, which means that she is going to tell her, and when SHE finds out she’s going to do this and then she’ll tell my boss and my boss will do this and then I’ll lose my job and I’ll not be able to pay the mortgage and then I’ll lose my house and I’ll be on the streets and everyone will hate me.

Sound roughly familiar?

There’s a whole chain of assumptions which could have been broken with number 4 above but if you get to the end then ask how likely it all is.

Seriously, ok maybe you messed up – how likely is it realistically that it will result in you being on the streets with everyone hating you?

How to stop worrying about losing everything:

Stop and ask yourself “realistically how likely is it that all this will happen?”

6. Stop thinking you’re special

When was the last time that you thought about what was going to happen in the future and it wasn’t something really bad?

When was the last time that your brain went through its sequence of thoughts and had you definitely winning the lottery or getting the partner of your dreams?

How to stop yourself worrying about everything going wrong:

Ask yourself “What makes me so special that you only get really bad things happening to me?”

7. Check how accurate your crystal ball is

If you catastrophize about the future it is probably not a new thing, you probably do it quite a lot.

You’ve probably imagined 100s of disaster scenarios in your life.

So let me ask you…..

How many times have you been right?

How many times has the awful scenarios which you fight in your brain actually come to pass?

The crystal ball you think you’re looking into is probably just a snow-globe that’s leaked.

How to stop catastrophizing:

Look at your track record of predicting what’s going to happen and realise that 999 out 1000 you’re wrong.

8. Look at your success track record

If you’re looking at the previous one and saying “well actually I’ve been right about a number of things”.

Ok, well the very fact that you’re reading this now means that the scenario that played out wasn’t bad enough that you died – because you’re here aren’t you?

That means that you went through your worst case scenario and made it out alive.

You’re a much more resilient creature than you realise perhaps, yes you might have been right about a few things. You did however make it through to the other side.

How to stop worrying about the future:

Use this as proof that even when the worst case scenario has hit you in your life you’ve made it through.

9. Realise the worst case scenario isn’t the end.

When we play out these over the top scenarios in our head our brains will often stop the thought at peak embarrassment or pain – unless the scenario finishes with the world ending then it isn’t the end.

How to deal with your worst case scenario:

Let’s say your catastrophe “ends” with you losing your job and let’s pretend that you have solid evidence that this worst case scenario is very likely.

Keep asking yourself “and then what happens?” and answering as logically as possible.

“And then what happens?”
– I’ll be unemployed
“And then what happens?”
– I won’t have much money
“And then what happens?”
– I’ll start looking for a new job
“And then what happens?”
– I’ll probably have a hard time and be on benefits for a while
“And then what happens?”
I’ll find a job

You see how we catastrophize this worst case scenario of losing our job but as we play this out even further into the future we see that eventually the problem is resolved anyway.

10. Slow that brain down

Catastrophic thinking can feel like your brain is operating at a thousand miles an hour. Slow everything down by getting a piece of paper and a pen (remember them?) and actually writing down what you’re thinking rather than just letting the runaway train of thoughts just keep on chugging.

Not only does this force your brain to slow down it also can be very cathartic to get the thoughts out of your head.

How to stop worrying about the future:

Write down your stream of consciousness on an actual piece of paper.

11. Thought stop

When you notice that your brain is starting to think the worst you can use a technique called thought stopping.

Basically you can just shout STOP (or say it to yourself in your head if you’re in public) – this throws a spanner in the works of your own head and breaks the chain of thoughts and let’s you challenge the thoughts you’ve had with socratic questioning or other CBT techniques.

How to stop catastrophising:

Use this thought stopping technique.

12. Accept the bad things do happen

Very few people’s lives go on with no adversity in them whatsoever. Life has its good times and its bad times and you’ve got through all of them so far.

Accept that you will occasionally go through some difficult times but that doesn’t mean that times are always going to be difficult

Anticipation is always worse than the actual event and you’ll get through any challenging times better than you even realise.

How to stop worrying so much about the future

Accept that bad things can and will happen and that you’ll get through them.

13. Realise the uncertainty is exciting and certainty is boring

This is a pretty important one, if you’d read down this far then you’ve earnt this one.

People worry about the future because they don’t know what is going to happen and their anxious brain assumes that this uncertainty is a bad thing.

I want you to think about the most exciting times in your life.

An example most people can get on board with (sorry if this misses you out) is when a new relationship is starting.

You’re just getting to know someone and you don’t know if they’re into you or not.

Waking up and seeing you’ve got a message from them and not knowing what it is going to say is exciting.

Going on a date and not knowing where the night will go is thrilling.

All of the lives in the world of uncertainty.

If you’re a sports fan you’ll know this too, you never know what the result of a match, game or fight will be. 

Uncertainty is the breeding ground for so many of our emotions, the positive ones and the negative ones.

Can you imagine living in a world where everything you did had a certain outcome?
When you swiped right on a dating app you actually knew instantly that they weren’t going to match?
When you watch football the best team on paper always won.
You knew exactly what would happen on a night out with friends before you even left the house?

Boring right?

RIGHT?

How to stop worrying about the future:

Embrace it, realise that it isn’t possible to know what’s going to happen and it is in fact more exciting to not know.

How to stop worrying about the future and catastrophizing.

The techniques and advice above really are some of the best education you can get simply from reading a blog.

It is all solid advice and the techniques advised are all born out of evidence based cognitive behavioural therapy.

Bottom line, if you can apply this to yourself then it’ll help you but I fully understand how difficult that can be to do.

The final point about uncertainty is a really important one to grasp because uncertainty really does allow us to feel the full range of human emotion.

A life full of certainty is a life that would be flat and dull and not one that many people would enjoy at all.

You are stronger and more powerful than you realise, you can cope with things better than you know and you can face things and overcome them.

You have before and you will again.

There’s absolutely nothing anywhere to say that uncertainty is going to bring about bad things in your life – the worst might happen and you’ll get through or the best can happen and you’ll love it.

There is a future version of you out there that you want to be that is full of confidence and optimism.

A version that made the decision to look at things a little differently, to question the proof of their own thoughts and to grab hold of uncertainty and say “hey, let’s see what you’ve got for me.”

Be that person.

Getting help to overcome worry about the future

If you like this blog and would like to learn specific techniques for overcoming anxiety in more depth then you might be interested in my 4-week anti-anxiety course “anxiousness to awesomeness” which you can find details of here.

Alternatively you can work directly with me 1-on-1 to help you become that future version of yourself that is everything you want to be.

If you’re interested in that then it starts with us having a free exploratory chat – if that sounds good then book in here.